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32nd over: New Zealand 131-3 (Williamson 38, Mitchell 1) Some intel from the venue! “A rather somnolent and subdued atmosphere here in the ground – a bit like a Sunday afternoon county game,” writes Showbizguru. “Even the Barmy Army trumpeter is struggling to raise any interest. Strange that both skippers would have bowled first on this green top. A couple of quick wickets are required [one since delivered]. On the plus side there’s great grub on offer. A ribeye steak with melted cheese in a ciabatta or a full wood-fired pizza. Just under a tenner each.” The post-lunch lull, everyone too full of steak ciabatta to make much noise.
WICKET! Ravindra c Crawley b Bashir 34 (New Zealand 130-3)
A breakthrough! Ravindra attacks Bashir, dancing down the pitch to turn the delivery into a full toss, but then biffs it straight to midwicket!
31st over: New Zealand 130-2 (Williamson 38, Ravindra 34) Well Williamson times this well enough, swatting Carse past mid-on for four, and then follows it with a straight drive for four more, and if those are his only two shots of the over, they’ll do.
30th over: New Zealand 122-2 (Williamson 30, Ravindra 34) England toss the ball to Shoaib Bashir, and try to see if their spinner can have a bit more luck than their seamers. Not yet.
29th over: New Zealand 120-2 (Williamson 29, Ravindra 33) Woakes bowls to Williamson, who seems to have temporarily misplaced his timing. Maiden.
28th over: New Zealand 120-2 (Williamson 29, Ravindra 33) Carse’s delivery flicks Williamson’s gloves and deflects into his helmet, but apparently not hard enough to require a concussion test. The only partnership in New Zealand’s entire Test history that has had as many as eight innings and outperformed this one is Nathan Astle and Mark Richardson, who averaged 74.11 in nine innings, the last of them a shade over a decade ago.
27th over: New Zealand 119-2 (Williamson 28, Ravindra 33) Woakes to Ravindra, who cuts past point for four. The Ravindra-Williamson partnership, currently in action for the eighth time, averages 68.42 in Tests, which is pretty handy, and that shot takes this one past 50.
26th over: New Zealand 114-2 (Williamson 28, Ravindra 29) Brydon Carse ends his over with a cracker to Williamson, who is beaten by the away movement. England haven’t really had the rub of the (very) green (pitch).
25th over: New Zealand 112-2 (Williamson 26, Ravindra 29) The first ball after lunch raps Ravindra on the pad, to much chuntering from the cordon, but it was heading down leg, and possibly flicked the bat on its way through. From there there are a few fine shots, culminating with a tasty four wide of mid-on. And with those runs Ravindra overtakes Williamson, despite facing 36 balls to his teammate’s 57.
The players emerge from their dressing-room-based mealtime, and more cricket is about to happen. Brace, brace, brace, etc.
“Just to check,” writes Tom Hopkins, “is overlooking a caught behind something that proper wicketkeepers tend to do?” I think it generally is more the kind of thing improper wicketkeepers get up to, but hey, nobody’s perfect.
Meanwhile in Guyana, Hampshire are playing Rangpur Riders in the Global Super League, with Shan Masood and James Fuller at the crease. Action here if you need something to see you through the lunch break.
LUNCH! New Zealand 104-2
And that is luncheon. New Zealand will be pretty pleased with that, while in England’s dressing room they’ll be turning off all the TVs, awkwardly avoiding the captain’s gaze, and pretending nothing interesting just happened.
24th over: New Zealand 104-2 (Williamson 26, Ravindra 21) Stokes bowls, Ravindra edges through to the keeper, and … nobody notices! Not a whisper from England. Nothing. Ooooh!, says Ollie Pope, before tossing the ball to Joe Root. Stokes just turns around and marches back to his mark. Scenes!
23rd over: New Zealand 103-2 (Williamson 26, Ravindra 20) Woakes is back for an over or two before lunch. Three runs off it.
22nd over: New Zealand 100-2 (Williamson 26, Ravindra 17) Stokes falls over in his follow-through, those slippy, dusty footholes wreaking havoc again, and to add insult to inconvenience it’s a wide and he has to bowl it again. He gets it right second time, beating Williamson’s outside edge, but that’s followed by a cover drive and then a pull, both for four, and Stokes has his head in his hands. 10 off the over, and New Zealand are in triple figures.
21st over: New Zealand 90-2 (Williamson 18, Ravindra 16) Edged, and short again! Ravindra pokes at Atkinson’s first ball but it plops just short of Root at first slip, but then the second ball is much less good and the result much less good also, Ravindra pulling for four.
20th over: New Zealand 83-2 (Williamson 18, Ravindra 9) Ben Stokes has a bowl, and when he bowls one short Williamson produces the shot of the day so far, pulling dismissively for four.
19th over: New Zealand 74-2 (Williamson 13, Ravindra 6) Atkinson keeps plugging away. England keep threatening, but they haven’t got the rewards they would have wanted at this point, having seen the pitch and won the toss. Meanwhile I’ve got some bad news for Leo Walmsley – as Ali reminds me from the ground, there’s no TMS, with TalkSport hogging the rights for this tour. You could try here.
18th over: New Zealand 72-2 (Williamson 12, Ravindra 5) Another cracking delivery, this time from Carse to Williamson, but again the batter gets nothing on it. Meanwhile Leo Walmsley would like the overseas TMS link if anyone’s got it to hand?
17th over: New Zealand 71-2 (Williamson 12, Ravindra 5) Phwoar, that is a peach of a delivery from Atkinson, but it rises just past Ravindra’s outside edge. Then Ravindra has a swing at a short one and misses, and there’s some discussion behind the stumps over whether he might have got a little something on it. But he didn’t get anywhere near it, and England wisely choose not to review.
16th over: New Zealand 71-2 (Williamson 12, Ravindra 5) Ravindra already looking pretty decent, and England starting to settle down for a bit of a grind.
15th over: New Zealand 68-2 (Williamson 12, Ravindra 2) Atkinson comes back. So far today a few players have found the pitch a bit skiddy, just where the bowlers’ feet are landing in their delivery stride, but the outfield hasn’t been skiddy enough, which is why there have been only six boundaries, all scored by Latham.
WICKET! Latham c Pope b Carse 47 (New Zealand 62-2)
14th over: New Zealand 62-2 (Williamson 8) England make the breakthrough with (deep breath) the last ball of the first over of the second hour of the first day! Nips off the seam, kisses the outside edge, gives Pope an easy catch behind the stumps, very nicely bowled.
A couple of balls earlier there’d been loud shout as Carse slammed one into Latham’s front pad, but it looked a bit high and England didn’t think it was worth a review. Plus it pitched outside the line of leg stump, so there’s that.
13th over: New Zealand 58-1 (Latham 44, Williamson 7) And that is DRINKS. An excellent first hour for New Zealand, with just the one wicket down and Tom Latham rattling along at a fair old pace – 44 now off 49 and a strike rate of 89.79.
12th over: New Zealand 49-1 (Latham 39, Williamson 4) Carse starts out over the wicket to Latham, who pushes at it as it angles across him but again no edge. Then an inside edge clears the stumps and runs away for a single.
11th over: New Zealand 43-1 (Latham 36, Williamson 1) Woakes is bowling excellently, though this is a quiet over rather than a dangerous one – he’s going at 2.66 an over, with all three of the day’s maidens, Atkinson 5.25, Carse 6.00.
10th over: New Zealand 43-1 (Latham 36, Williamson 1) Brydon Carse replaces Atkinson, and Kane Williamson scores a single off his 14th delivery. Then Latham edges well wide of the slips and that’s another boundary.
9th over: New Zealand 37-1 (Latham 32, Williamson 0) Gorgeous delivery from Woakes, moving quite sharply off the seam, and somehow Latham doesn’t get any bat on it! He gets plenty of bat on the next mind, middling it through mid-off for four.
8th over: New Zealand 33-1 (Latham 28, Williamson 0) Another no ball from Atkinson, another boundary for Latham. “Hi there,” writes Dean Kinsella. Hi! “Another sleepless night ahead of us. Its great being retired. I see Athers has questioned the wisdom of bringing three spinners on a tour to NZ and only one keeper. The upshot of which is that Pope is picked at 6 and gets the gauntlets. My feeling is he was pretty close to being dropped. Is he going to be the latest batter/keeper who keeps his place even with poor form?” That’s down to Bethell, I think. If another batter gets a chance and makes an unarguable claim for inclusion in the side, and with Jamie Smith certain to come back in at the start of the summer, then Pope’s grip on a place becomes extremely uncertain.
7th over: New Zealand 25-1 (Latham 21, Williamson 0) Edged! But it doesn’t carry to Ben Duckett at fourth slip, and Williamson gets away with it. And again! This one lands even shorter. A maiden from Woakes, who hasn’t had much luck so far.
6th over: New Zealand 25-1 (Latham 21, Williamson 0) Since Conway’s wicket Latham has faced 21 deliveries, and Kane Williamson has faced just three. He faces all six of these, sending the first of them rattling through mid-off for four.
5th over: New Zealand 19-1 (Latham 15, Williamson 0) It’s all going on here. Latham leaves Woakes’ second delivery, which bounces just over the top of the stumps. Then he works one to fine leg for four, and hits the next to Bashir, who gathers and sends a bizarre throw nowhere near Ollie Pope or indeed any of the four members of the cordon and away for four overthrows! Then the last shapes away, just beating the edge.
4th over: New Zealand 8-1 (Latham 4, Williamson 0) Apparently, the commentary team tells me, this pitch is not as green, as dark or indeed as lush as it often is here, so perhaps my description a short while ago was a little overblown. Looks plenty green to me, though.
3rd over: New Zealand 5-1 (Latham 1, Williamson 0) Four leaves and then two not-leaves from Latham, the last of which gets him off the mark.
2nd over: New Zealand 4-1 (Latham 0) Gus Atkinson shares new ball duties. There are a couple of no balls but alongside those he tempts Devon Conway into having a bit of a push at one he should have left well alone, but he doesn’t get bat on ball, and then Conway mistimes a drive off the last, his bat slips in his hands as the ball hits it and it goes back whence it came, into Atkinson’s mitts.
WICKET! Conway c&b Atkinson 2 (New Zealand 4-1)
Last ball of the over, and Conway prods it back towards Atkinson, who reacts well to grab it as it flies to the left of his left shin!
1st over: New Zealand 0-0 (Latham 0, Conway 0) Just as the first ball is bowled, the big bongs of (arguably) major breaking news chime as the following lands from ECB HQ. Looks like Ollie Robinson’s new passport has been delivered:
Durham’s Ollie Robinson added to England Men’s Test Squad
Durham wicketkeeper-batter Ollie Robinson has been added to the England Men’s Test squad for the tour of New Zealand. Robinson replaces Essex’s Jordan Cox, who sustained a fractured right thumb during the team’s warm-up period last weekend in Queenstown.
This marks the 25-year-old Robinson’s first call-up to the senior England squad. He has delivered solid performances for Durham in the County Championship, boasting an average of 48 with the bat in 2024 and an impressive 58 in 2023. Robinson has also demonstrated his skill behind the stumps, with 92 Championship dismissals across the past two seasons.
A regular in England Lions squads since 2019, Robinson has gained valuable experience on tours to Australia, Sri Lanka, and India in recent years.
Robinson is expected to join the squad in New Zealand on Saturday.
Right, anthems sung, players out. Chris Woakes has the ball. Cricket imminent.
“Why is Bashir playing instead of Leach?” harrumphs Paul McIntyre. Well, because he’s England’s first-choice spinner in all conditions, as Ben Stokes put it in Pakistan last month.
Meanwhile I’ve just had my first ever tacle and it was extremely nice, though I’m not convince we need any more similarly-flavoured orange citrus fruits. Enough already!
We’ve had our first look at the Test match pitch, and it is greener than a jealous, queasy tree frog.
So the debutants can chill out for a while: Jacob Bethell is unlikely to be batting this morning, and Nathan Smith is unlikely to bowl. Meanwhile, an email!
“I loved the idea of Moneyball and using recognised but under appreciated metrics of genuine impact, but also love the adrenaline-fuelled gut-feeling selection policy of Bazball,” says Tom van de Gucht. “But rather than, as Harry Hill would say, ‘Which one is better, there’s only one way to find out, Fiiiiigghghhhht!’ I’d genuinely love to know how much the data crunching has progressed and is still going on behind the scenes.
“There must be so much more intel on all biomechanical data, yet Stokes and McCullum seem to be going back to the style of the talent scouts Billy Beane fought against, who used selection criteria such as how symmetrical the player’s face was and if they looked good when running. Unless it’s all a smokescreen and their selections are massively data driven, but they’d prefer to sell their laid back image to pull opponents onto a false sense of security.”
In short, and to summarise, you don’t have a clue what’s going on.
England win the toss!
Ben Stokes has won the toss for England and has chosen to have a bowl.
Right then, the British TV coverage has started and a coin toss should be incoming.
Ali’s been a busy little bee, there not being much else to do in New Zealand except write about cricket, and here’s his bit on a reenergised and refocused Ben Stokes:
Come rain or shine, New Zealand cricketers tend to wear a smile on their faces. But this week there is a palpable glow around the place, that remarkable clean sweep in India, coupled with victory for the women’s team in the T20 World Cup, still fresh in the memory. Hagley Oval is sold out for the first Test against England, folks drawn to its inviting grass banks.
English cricket has felt a little less cheery by contrast, be it their women’s team flunking that latest shot at a global title, the continuing culture war as the sale of the Hundred teams gathers pace, or the men’s Test side having lost in Pakistan to reopen the debate about the merits of so-called Bazball. Ben Stokes seemed to embody the mood in Pakistan, his return from a hamstring injury resulting in what he calls one of his toughest trips. A burglary back at home added to the stress levels and nearly forced an early flight back, only for his wife, Clare, to persuade him otherwise.
But before the first Test that gets under way on Thursday (10pm on Wednesday in the UK), Stokes appeared refreshed and re-energised.
Much more here:
Here’s a memorable quote from Warwickshire’s Olly Hannon-Dalby about Jacob Bethell:
He’s just one of those guys. A cool cat, quietly confident, funny but also seriously hungry and hard-working. He’s made two international debuts already, just bagged an IPL deal and he is about to play Test cricket. He’ll probably end up marrying a Bond girl.
And here’s Ali Martin’s profile of Bethell, which handily is the article the quote came from:
Hello world!
If you’re only as good as your last game, New Zealand are phenomenal and England concerning. But Christchurch is not Rawalpindi and nor is it Mumbai, and at the risk of stating the obvious these will be different teams in a different situation. Since they wrapped up a 3-0 series win at the Wankhede at the start of the month New Zealand have left out Will Young, who scored 244 at 48.80 in India and was named player of the series, and Ajaz Patel, who took 15 wickets in those three games, bringing back old-timers Tim Southee and Kane Williamson as well as a debutant seamer in Nathan Smith. Meanwhile since the loss that condemned them to a 2-1 series defeat in Pakistan last month England have gone from three spinners to one, given Ollie Pope the gloves and brought in a debutant of their own in No3 Jacob Bethell, veteran of 20 first-class games. If this isn’t quite a clean slate it is at least a slate that requires only minor washing up.
There seems to have been a lot of interesting Test cricket happening over the last couple of months, and I’m looking forward to a bit more. Welcome!
Since we already know the teams, this might be a good place to put them:
New Zealand XI: Tom Latham (capt), Devon Conway, Kane Williamson, Rachin Ravindra, Daryl Mitchell, Tom Blundell (wk), Glenn Phillips, Nathan Smith, Tim Southee, Matt Henry, Will O’Rourke.
England XI: Zak Crawley, Ben Duckett, Jacob Bethell, Joe Root, Harry Brook, Ollie Pope (wk), Ben Stokes (c), Chris Woakes, Gus Atkinson, Brydon Carse, Shoaib Bashir.
Umpires: Ahsan Raza (Pak) and Rod Tucker (Aus).
TV umpire: Adrian Holdstock (SA).